Journeying Onward: Finding refuge

Yesterday, I admit I went to church with a heavy heart. I think sometimes when we are feeling discouraged it is easy to hide away until the storm passes but one thing I know about the Lord: He knows it all and the best place for me is to go to the "heavenly hospital" to get a touch from Him.

As we walked in they started singing "Jesus is on the Mainline" and I just looked at David and smiled. David sang that song and it has always been my favorite. The interesting part is that we haven't ever sang that song at church but the morning David comes with it they sing it!! A coincidence? I don't think so.

After we sang a good number of good gospel song the pastor came up and began to pray. He said, "someone here needs specific prayer".   I was out of my seat like a rabbit fleeing a fire!   I knelt down and the moment I bowed my head and my heart the tears began to flow.   I laid things down before Him one by one by one and as I did healing and peace began to come into my soul.   I have been thinking about this lately alot and I am not sure if it is just me or it is something we all struggle with but here it is:   when I am going through tough times I sometimes overlook the emotional pain of it and it isn't until I cry out (literally) to Him that He is able to come to that wounded place in my heart and begin to heal me. I am all for believing and praying, but at times I need to be believing, and praying and crying for Him to be able to really get into those deep crevices of my heart and reassure me of His care and His love.

And that is what He did:   He came like a Father only can and soothed my soul so profoundly and beautifully. He assured me that He is working deep in David and although he will have physical challenges in his life God is drawing him into a deeper reality of who he is before Him and what He can do in and through Him.   He assured me that He can not and will not fail us and we can rest assured that He will continue to provide for us. In a way it is good to be financially 'strapped' here in Roatan because we are in good company with most of the people who live here. He takes care of them, He takes care of the birds and I know He will take care of us as well. (Matt. 5)

the light began to dawn as He spoke to my soul about His care

It is a wonderful thing to be able to weep with brothers and sisters too. It is the one thing I love about our church in French Harbour:   It is the real deal.   You don't need to come in looking all fine and go away looking all fine but being a mess inside. It is okay to quietly come before Him with whatever, whenever in the service. It isn't uncommon to see someone just slip up to the front and then someone else will just go pray with them. And that is what it is all about right? The church should be more like a hospital instead of a gathering where we do our best to look our best when inside we are dying a slow and quiet death.

I am grateful, so very grateful for the support I received yesterday at church.   And here is the interesting part: no one asked me what is wrong, because they didn't need to know what is wrong they just needed me to find WHO was all right.   And I did. Thank You Jesus....

I don't know what you are going through but if you are in a valley or a fog or in pain at all then find Him IN it.   He sympathizes with our weaknesses and if a very present help in times of trouble.

No matter what... He is near.

No matter what.. He is sovereign.

No matter what... He is working it out.